Wow, I think I've deserted this journal for long enough. It seems every time I start a new relationship, I also start a new journal = = So like, in highschool I had this hyperactive blogger account:
http://chaoie.blogspot.com/ (haha)
Although I hardly ever look back to it now, I did love that blog. And then I came to Livejournal, because a lot of my friends were using it at the time (most have totally abandoned it now, and might I add- without the slightest hint of guilt)... this blog brings back memories. Some wonderful, some happy, some sad, some inspiring, some awful, some super... but seriously, isn't this what life is about? So yeah, I loved this blog too. For most, I just wish everyone I love/had loved in the past, and everyone I love now and will love in the future, AND everyone who loves me (bwahahaha)... I just wish that we can ALL get a happy ending, y'know?
I mean, some people we were once so close to eventually became strangers, which is sad but it happens... and then some people who are total strangers become people we're really close to.
I'd be lying if I said I don't miss the good times I had in the past, if I didn't miss the good friends (amongst other things :p ) I had in those times, but I'm not lying when I say I don't miss the tough times (that's not saying I regret them). Of course, it's the tough times that help us to grow and mature into the people we are today. But we should all realize that nothing evolves around us; although we may be sad, the one who made us sad may be happy, and after that, it's our own choice- it's difficult but true- we CHOOSE whether to be happy or stuck in a rut.
For me, being happier has involved losing a part of myself, but sometimes we have to sacrifice. I will be able to find this part back, I think.
Anyway, I just want to say that I'm happy for myself and I'm happy for you. Although you hurt me in the past, and perhaps I also hurt you, and heaven knows I've hurt other people (in the even MORE ancient past) by becoming the said stranger myself *looks sheepish, can I sneak in a dearly belated "sorry" here?* but I know that we'd all probably still be there for each other in a strangers-but-not kind of way (does that even make sense?). Maybe these lines will never cross again, or maybe one day we will get to smile at each other and say, in spite of everything:
THANK YOU. Because if I had been without you (that's plural) all those years, I wouldn't be me : )
And just for kicks: MY FIRST EVER LIVEJOURNAL post. EVERYONE I TAGGED IS IN HERE SOMEWHERE - amazing huh? (if you're not then you're either up there or down there): There's a disturbance in the air, something, somewhere... oh yes, the very air we are breathing in is filled with the one unfathomable thing we wish to suck the life out of.
Ting says she's heartbroken. She says she's in love with that music, but she says it tears your heart apart.
And then she rather too cheerfully informed me that I should listen to it.
Ha. Ha. Thanks but no thanks, may it be the most beautiful melody in the world, but I would like to keep my heart whole. It's ugly and scarred but as of yet, it hasn't complete broken apart- perhaps it is some part of me desperately trying to keep it together and to keep sane.
Eighteen days.
Could mean a lot of things, and yet at the same time, so little.
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Day 18 I want to jump. And fly. Preferably not out of a window on the millionth story of some random building that doesn't exist. Unless I feel like bungee jumping.
Also, I think I'd like to be a gecko. Stupid Zumdahl.
Day 17 Today I talked to a random person. And, surprise surprise, it was very random. I like sea animals. Shinny says I am a seal and she is a pufferfish. Ting is a turtle. Mel is a catfish, Rei is a squid/lobster, Rea is a jellyfish, Vivo is a starfish and Kathy is a clownfish. Maybe we can all be one big happy family. If we don't end up eating each other.
Hmmm, I'd hate to be the algae.
Day 16 Pool is too addictive. I think I need to smash some of those tables with my amazing taekwondo flying kicks.
Day 15 Taekwondo induces endorphins. No really, it's proven. I'm sure Ting got a kick by kicking me.
Day 14 Albert promised that he would allow Ting and yours truly to kick him many many times on Friday. Now we both have something to look forward to. I decided he is also a tres cool turtle because he obviously evolutionized from the lowly crab.
Day 11 Michael says he is too old to go into competitions. Apparently he's retired. I asked him if I should get him a coffin for his next birthday.
Day 10 Sadira sms-ed me saying she's house-sitting somewhere in Heidelberg. We all need to crash her place. Seriously, it must be lonely without the net. Hopefully she knows how to cook and is still alive by the time we get there...
I suggested she try knitting while waiting for us to appear on the doorstep.
Day 9 Got up at 10 and spent the whole day in Box Hill library. Worth skipping a day of pointless Animal Science lectures and round table discussions. Worked three hours straight. Joyfully, I can now recite to you the first 30 elements of the Periodic Table and the atomic masses of the important ones. Also am now up to chapter 4 in Physics. The last time I checked, I was up to the first page of the textbook.
The next Chem prac is so bloody long that I have no doubt it will be very tedious.
Day 8 Ting and I may be volunteering for Eminence. We took Albert (Turtle Boy's) posters (of Spirited Away) so he made us join the volunteers. Thank God it's after exams. I'm to help him stick the posters in the Girls' toilets.
How do they think of these places?
Day 7 We now officially have a Belgrave/Lilydale family. Lara, Philbert (haha), Will, Albert, Micheal (ie/ sideshow), Shinny (till Burnley), Ting and myself. So many people catch our line.
Will made up some stupid nickname for Philbert. Philbert called Will "little Willie" with Ting adding the "sugarpops". So now he's officially known as "Little Willie Sugarpops". It has a ring to it.
Day 6 Added guy Cheow (more preferably known as Cleatus the slack jawed yokel) on msn.
He informed me that he was going to train the shit out of us on Friday (we are trying to up our fitness levels in time for August Comp/Unigames). I told him that I was sure he could amuse himself by doing squats for an hour.
He said he likes squats. The bastard.
Day 5 Some random person who does not appear on my msn list started talking to me. The moment I saw "hey Yowie" I knew there could only be two options.
1) Sideshow Mike.
2) Wan.
After a couple of minutes of talking to a person I had no clue as to the identity of, I asked who this was. Strangely, it was Wan. HA.
Day 4 Turtle Boy is actually quite talented. He can make snowflakes during lectures in the space of a couple of seconds. But the scrap piece of paper needs to be large. However it ends up very pretty after he finishes jabbing/cutting/slashing/hurting it.
Day 3 Pool again. Ting's ex-Mel High cronies are always up in The Pub. Within two seconds of the me and Lauren (the people who have no clue how to play pool) VS Ting and oh-my-god-I-can't-believe-I've-forgotten-his-name Lauren and I won the game. We conclued that oh-my-god-I-can't-believe-I've-forgotten-his-name is colour-blind and can only see in tones. However, they didn't get pensed.
Oh I remembered his name. It's Yang.
Day 2 Step-sis is bugging me to take her to see The Da-Vinci code. So when international-student-who-works-at-my-dad's-fish-and-chip-shop called to ask if I wanted to see The Da-Vinci code I suggested he take her along instead as I have to study.
Day 1 Decided I need a day of relaxation from all the study I'd been doing for the exams.
Day 0 Realized I haven't actually studied for the exams.
---
Of course, I am glad that in reality, I still have 18 days left.
Conclusion: find me in the library (Ballieu, Boxhilll... I like the B's... but any other will also be fine. I would probably be lurking in the corner there. I wonder if Union House and The Pub count as libraries?).
I'm the happy flying pig on your left, my right, their front.
The disturbance in the air is due to my flapping wings.
Cheers,
-chao.
AND I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M PUTTING THIS UP but here it is! But my first ever Blogger Blog (omg the embarrassment!!! Was that, like, ME writing???): The first thing I haf to say here is that this is definitely not my first blog... as may of you have experienced, blogs are very hard to update all the time...consistantly. --, fine, I do noe some people who update it every day.... lol, ahha, and I'm definitely not promising that, but I will update once in a while... In a while o.O
Anyway, uh, my name is Chao, ppl call me many nicknames, mah Chinese one is xiao chao and chao chao *^_^* heheh, dun call me the latter, onli mah parents do, um, people call me chaoie, chaoey wowy... --".... uh chaocow, lol, I insist cows r cute! :P But there's also just plain old chao.
I'm in year 11, am a self professed weird chick, lol, but for that same reason people talk to me a lot, which is wierd too o.O. Hmmmm.
I dun think I can live without the net though I will haf to *force* myself to give it up next year- not healthy for the 99.95 ENTER I'm aiming for. :P jkjk
Well, actualli, my *mum* is aiming for. At the start, like a family friend got 91 for ENTER or sumdin and mums like, yeah, get above that. So I'm like yay! And then this chick got 97 percent and mums like, u betta beat her... so I was like....haha....right --. And then this other chick got 99.3 so mums like *glare* at me, and I'm like, yeah I know, I know, geez.
And then this stupid ex Mel. High boy (just the fact that he's from Mel. High says a lot dun it :P) got 99.4 sooo now...now....
I haf to beat him. Haha, not the literal hadns and fist beat, tho I could do that! Wait, no, scratch that, I would love to get mah hands on his stupid little Mel. high neck and wring it! After all, I'm a tyke-master :P
--
Parents!
But yeah it's Mothers Day on Sunday and I bought mummy a heater. And I had to lug this heater that was out half the size of me around at Box Hill centro and looked like a frickin headless chicken at the- you guessed it- where else more suitable than Red Rooster? -_______- Oh yes, I'm opposed to KFC, they treat their chicken bad and as a member of the headless chicken clan, I vote I want mah head bak!!!!-.-
Neewaiz, am goin out on Saturday with mummy to haf dinner, lol, she expects me to pay!! O.O Even though she's the one who wouldn't let me get a job resulting in mah now relative povness. Hahah, yes, relative compared to *some* people I noe! No names here or anything, lol.....
Wahahahhahahaha, buh trust me, there will be in the future! Allz for now~ buh-baiz! ^_^V
hugs n lotsa watermelon!! :P
This is Chaoie.
&We peace out.
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